I'll go b-b-b-backwards.

-Art class this calm October morning is going well, I'm quite happy with the friends I have made and I will tell you of them in bullet point in the following.-

- Terry, the Montrealer with an old soul and lots to talk about.
- Amanda, whose mother is not to die for but finds happiness despite all she's gone through at the ripe age of 14.

-That's all I can take on my plate for now, yesterday while I was buying some popcorn from the vending machine Joshua came to me, large pupiled and ecstatic, our conversation went something similiar to..
"Hey Christine, (I stare him in the eyes, and take note of his enlarged pupils and happy mood), I guess we're not really friends anymore. (I say no) Well that's okay. I just want you to know, that on October 12th I'm coming clean of everything, cocaine and e, and I'm only going to smoke pot on weekends. (I keep staring blankly at the vending machine, trying to decide what to buy but my head is a mess of thought "Prove it to me", I say) "I love you Christine, I always will." (I turn to him briefly, knowing that it may be drugs talking and not himself, but the words shatter my shield and weaken me. My eyes water and my chin wobbles I don't look at him again and he leaves. Terry appears by my side and her presence strengthens me) "Christine? Are you okay? Christine you're scaring me." She says, and I finish buying my chips and slowly all my sad thoughts diminish into nothing.. We are going to go smoke a cigarette now. This is the third time I've come close to crying in the past week. Being clean is getting harder every day, each day draws me closer to the possibility of picking up a pipe or popping a pill. I can feel them dragging at my soul, tearing at my bones, I am weak.-